Lies I told and Simple Kitchen Butterscotch Pie

I think I am pretty damned funny. I am the gal who says something and then laughs. I guess you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes. Whatever. But even MORE sometimes I think something then laugh. Those are the rough moments….there is no explaining your way out of that and people start using terms like “multiple personality” and “keep your kids away from her”. *sigh*

I was trooping around the city with my double stroller, JJ and Montana on a sunny crisp autumn morning. All of the sudden someone stunk to high hell so we popped into the Nordstrom bathroom where I felt ok about changing the twins. There was a woman there in the lounge area. “Twins!!!!!” her eyes lit up, I think she even drooled a little. She was washing her dentures in the sink….I feel compelled to share this with you to let you have an idea approx age and amount of public savvy we are dealing with.

“Yes” I smiled at her and started my dipe changing process. “Are they natural?” she asks. Umm….no, I built them out of batteries and chucky dolls. Of course my kids are natural. But what she WANTS to know is if I used fertility methods and got twins. This, of course, is not her business. BUT, I am a blogger and I have been sharing my journey for years, and if you read my blog you would know I used IVF, and every other form of fertility asisstance. I am very ok with this. I am an advocate for assisted reproduction. I am happy to field questions and send you in the direction of a great physician. I mean this. Email me, send me a FB request, IG me. (did I miss anything??)

“Yes! They sure are!” I lied. At which point I avoid Brandie's face (my friend who is with me) otherwise we will both lose it. “Oh! Do twins run in your family?” “No!” I reply. “We are the first to have them!” I also smile at her. My dirty lying smile.

“How old are you?” she asks. Really? I am thinking. Are you kidding me? Where is the camera? “32! Still very young!” I reply. At this point I am expecting Brandie to fall out of her chair. This would be en even bigger lie. A lie on par with white collar crime. I could get sent to Federal Prison this lie is so big. She eyeballs me…searching my face for lines, wear and tear…..then relplies “Well you could have more if you wanted!” END SCENE.

So…as a wrap up to my lies, I do want to tell you that I really don't mind if people ask. Twins are that interesting phenomenon that people want to understand. It is neat. My kids are special. I get it and I agree.

I also think pie is special, particularly when it tastes good and is easy to make, like this fluffy butterscotch pie. I know it is not made of gourmet products, but it is easy. It tastes very good and I actually used fat free products to lighten it up and it took very little time……

SIMPLE KITCHEN BUTTERSCOTCH PIE

Ingredients

1 (3.4 ounce) package instant butterscotch pudding mix

2 cups milk

1 (8 ounce) container frozen whipped topping, thawed

1 (9 inch) prepared graham cracker crust (Or make your own crust like I did so it wasnt a TOTALLY processed item.

2 tablespoons butterscotch ice cream topping

 

Directions

In a large bowl, mix pudding mix and milk according to package directions. Fold half of the whipped topping into pudding. Pour mixture into graham cracker crust. Spread remaining whipped topping on top of pudding layer. Cover and refrigerate for about an hour.

Serve cold with a drizzle of butterscotch topping over top of pie. I ran my knife along the top to make it look fancy

 

Missy Maki’s Weekly OBSESSIONS!

I go in spurts. I love different things each week and if you follow me on twitter (@missymaki) or in instagram (@missymaki) you will know that I am like a kid who lost her ADD meds. I am all over the board. One week I am theme dressing the kids, the next I cannot stop baking muffins, then I am obsessing about weather or rain (I love rain). You absolutely 100% cannot count on me to be in the same state of mind each time you see me….because I am thinking about something different. I thought I would attempt to track my obsessions….

Obsession #1 PHO

Pho is a Vietnamese noodle soup made with linguini-shaped rice noodles, herbs and meats. It is a popular street food in vietnam, and even more so in Portland among the ker-zillion food carts. They have basil, lime, jalapeños, sprouts, a little hoisin (sweet plum sauce) on the side and a little chili sauce. Each vendor has a different set up and a different broth. It is FREAKING PENICILLIN. I am not kidding. It will burn the be-jeezus out of any virus that you come across. ANY-HOOOO…I ate this for lunch 3 times this week. Totally obsessed. IRONICALLY….when I got pregnant this was my first aversion. In fact, I was heard saying “If you dare bring pho in this office you are fired”. I am pretty sure I broke some labor laws there, but have you ever been pregnant with twins? No? Well let me explain. You get 2 times the hormones so twice the nausea. But I am BACK! I love Pho! All is good in the world.

Obsession #2: Microsoft Surface

Dear IPad:

While I love how you glide under my finger and have a ton of games and I can text on you and have pictures on you, I have a newsflash: I HAVE AN IPHONE AND IT IS EVEN BETTER THAN YOU ARE! YOU DONT WORD PROCESS. Let me say that again: You. Don't. Word. Process. Love, Missy Maki

I saw that commercial for the Surface and guess what? I am sitting here drinking coffee waiting for my husband to wake up and Best Buy to open. Surface – you are MINE and I will make you my bitch.

Obsession #3: Office Supplies

I just finished my first week back in the office after maternity leave and my desire to purchase pink and purple file folders and pens as well as a new file cabinets and even throw pillows and an easy chair for my office is out of control. Don't judge me. I LOVE my office and I LOVE my job and I want it to be a place that is my home away from home. When I took my job, in my mind I committed to 10 years in the role. But now it is ON. Now that I have officially gotten pregnant, had the babies and I am back, I can finally settle in. I am staying for a long time, bitches, so step aside as I bring my floor lamp and wall art in. Mama is getting comfortable.

Obsession #4: Cronuts

Dammit. Dammit all to hell. Damn you evil genius (Dominique, you know who you are) who decided that the already amazing donut (I love donuts) should be made with croissant dough? Yes, you were right, it is 100% the right thing to do. It isnt like a deep fried twinkie (WTH??) It is a masterpiece. A work of art.

A Cronut basically makes a brain say “This is all I need. I don't need my family, a job, or even air. Just this Cro-nut.” There is a certain je ne sais quoi about a cronut. Mystery. Intrigue. Whoops….sorry, getting carried away. Here is the deal….apparently the creator, New York's Dominique Ansel ( @dominiqueansel ) will get on a plane and break your legs if you try to copy him. Good luck Dom. I mean…..it is like me putting Salt and Pepper together in one shaker and calling it SPEPPERT and then threatening anyone who tries to copy me. **throws hands in the air to show ridiculousness with passionate body movement** I officially give everyone the right to bear cronuts. Now bakeries in P-Tizzle, GET BUSY!

I digress.

These are my obsessions, and if I could play the classic ANIMOTION song in the background I would.

BONUS OBSESSION: The Justin Timberlake SNL skit making fun of hastaggers (guilty!!) when he says “hashtag ….is it worth it let me work it ” OMG. It is on loop in my brain. Genius. Plus the added bonus of me using hashtags more responsibly. Thanks JT!

 

No seriously…..I got this….

Okay, I am wrapping up my first week of being back to work. I have gathered a few thoughts from this week. I want to review them with you….unsolicited? Yes. But read anyways. Please and thank you:

  1. Work days fly by. You get there, you eat lunch, you go home. There is not enough time in the day and the luxury of staying late is gone as a parent. So you literally have to get your work done NOW. RIGHT NOW. IMMEDIATELY.
  2. Everyone is skinny. What happened? Did you all go on a freaking diet while I was on maternity leave? It does not help that food is comforting. Or that I love to cook, or that I have a house filled with food. Or that I work in an environment that is FOOD-CENTIRC. I give up. Damn you all.
  3. Exercise is no longer a task but a luxury. I went for a run and it felt like I bought a new pair of fabulous shoes. Same high. You feel me here?
  4. I need my friends to text me. Just say hi. I am lost in a new world….jolt me back to NOW please. Granted I have NO time for you, but send me a picture of the gross guy hitting on you. I will appreciate it and will reciprocate when you have twins ahem, I mean…a baby.
  5. I do a lot of work at 4am when I am feeding my children. I think my clients may think I have a coke problem. No….just a twin mom. Thats all. Carry on….
  6. I love coffee more than food. I do. More than wine or chips or frosting. I love it. Coffee dates are always welcome. This Christmas just buy me coffee. No keychains or sweaters. Coffee. Thank you.
  7. When I get home all I want to do it roll around on the floor with my children. Give them baths, hold them, sing, laugh and dress them up like Ewoks. The rest of the world fades away.
  8. I need to start having more sex. That used to be the Entree of life. When you have kids it becomes a healthy dessert. You have to finish your dinner first but you barely have time to get through the entree….much less the salad course…so sex/dessert….it hits the skids. I used to be the douchey person who said “oh…not us, we are FAR to well matched and crazy about each other for this to happen” all I have to say to that is: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Oh, and HAHA.
  9. I have found that I am more in love with my husband now than before. Simply because he blows raspberries on the kids tummies when he changes them….or refers to his son as “J-Dawg” and calls his daughter “Pin-cess” I die……
  10. I am a great mom. I have an affinity for it. I am attentive, aware, and not over obsessive. Because of our casual attitude and assumtion that everything will be fine our children are calm. Cry very little, smile a lot and sleep 8 hours at 14 weeks. The calmer I am as a Mommy, the more relaxed my children are.
  11. I have absolutely no clue what I am doing. I have read zero books, I am a novice, I have almost dropped each of them on several occasions, my son has peed in my hair and I have had poop on my face. While I know I am clueless, I am fine with it. I also ignore google. I ask our mothers what to do. I like Jason and myself and our brothers, so why wouldn't I ask them what they did? They did a great job!

So, seriously. I got this. Do I need help? Yes please. Do I drink every night? Yes, but just one. Am I happy? I wouldn't trade lives with ANYONE. I am the luckiest girl on this here planet.

 

Look! I am exercising!

This is the guy you MARRY.

 

Product Review: Marshall’s Haute Sauce

I think we all know Missy Maki is a sucker for a local product. I truly get excited when I see “Oregon” on a lable and whether you live in our fair state or not….you should too. We are an all encompassing state. We have the ocean, forests, and even desert. We have apple orchards and cranberry bogs. We have salt harvesting and wine making. We have honeys with different flavors based on the neighborhood the bees live in…..we are an amazing state. You should check us out. We are THAT awesome.

I came across these sauce-makers via another local product. Sarah and Dirk Marshall are making amazing sauces, jams and rubs, and I truly just thought they were making hot sauce until they gave me some bacon jam (whoa, breakfast will never be the same) and some potato rub (ridiculously good….I am sprinkling it on anything that even has a shred of potato in it) and even a seasonal Cranberry Red Jalapeno sauce. Can you imagine? I don't have to. I own it. So THERE. (sticks tongue out)

The sauces are clearly lableled with the date of creation as well as the batch number. Pretty damn cool. Above is a photo of the gift pack I have, I have already used each of these and the Habanero Carrot Curry is my favorite…outside of the potato rub not pictured here but currently enjoying a short-lived shelf life that all beloved spices go through. If you are a cook or baker, you understand this.

These sauces are great finishing sauces, they can be added to slow cooking pots (I did this with the BBQ on some chicken breast – YUM!) or just dip some corn chips in them and feel smug that you are eating a local product! They are gorgeous and you will absolutely get people asking about the unique flavors. But….lets talk about the product…I mean REALLY, let's talk about the product:

When the Marshalls came on my show (Sarah is pregnant so I have decided we are best friends because that happens when you have kids…..you just decide that because you both have been pregnant you have everything in common) I asked about the product. They described the ingredients as a “list of their friends”. Let me explain: They know every person who made the indredients in all of their products. They know the beekeeper who makes the honey (Damian of Bee Local) they know the people who grew the carrots, they know the genleman who harvested the salt (Ben of Jacobsen's Salt) They have Peppers being grown specifically for THEM. I ask you….is this not a product that is second to none? Yes. Yes it is.

When I asked about growth, they looked at each other and smiled. They explained that it was important to be involved in making their beautiful sauces and that world domination was not the goal. Making an amazing tasting and locally sourced product was the goal. Hold onto your morals and ethics you two…..growth is inevitable. Trust me here.

You can find Marshall's Haute Sauces in local stores but easiest is to go to their gorgeous website at www.marshallshautesauce.com But they are everywhere…..New Seasons, Elephants, Tails and Trotters, Stone Cottage, Local Choice Market…… You can meet them in person at the PSU Farmers Market and at most of the big farmers markets during the “season”.

Well done Mr and Mrs Marshall. Well done indeed.

 

Autumn and Panini Pressed Comfort Foods

Football season is upon us and that means autumn crisp weather, baking, and comfort foods! As we slip back into our cozy clothes we are more forgiving of those extra naps and calories consumed. Here in the Pacific Northwest we are bears…we hibernate while keeping one eye on Pac-12 football!

My Panini Press is one of the best purchases I have made in my kitchen. I use it for grilled sandwiches all the time. Another hint? It makes perfect quesadillas in a snap. Breakfast quesadillas are perfect – try pre-scrambling eggs then pull the press out and some cheese and some leftover potatoes and you will be a HUGE hit! Throw some leftover herbs in them as well!

Paninis are so simple and a great way to control calories because they are usually nonstick and you can entirely forgo butter! since it cooks so crisply and evenly you can even reduce the cheese amount and increase the lean proteins! Think leftover pork loin and a smoky gouda! Turkey breast and a sharp cheddar and perhaps some of that freezer jam! Yes….I said jam! Sweet and savory is the wave of the future!

You can literally clean out the fridge with your panini press and if you have picky kids? In the same press you can have a pesto, bleu cheese and fresh tomato for Mommy, a simple cheddar and turkey for the littles, and a sliced meatball, leftover spaghetti sauce and mozzarella panini for Daddy! I cannot express how fantastic this tool is and easy to clean! I keep mine right in the front and center of my pantry!

When you are our dining and junior doesn’t finish his chicken tenders….box them up. Cut them up, swish them around in some Franks Hot Sauce then put on some fluffy French bread with mozzarella. Your football watching other half will LOVE it and you just saved a bundle!

Those dinner rolls? PERFECT for panini night. Have you ever had a stuffing, cranberry sauce, turkey and cheddar panini? You should…..

Of course….Dont forget good old cheese panini and tomato soup!

Have fun! Pull out the panini tonight and save some money! Make sure you have bread and cheese on hand and the rest will take care of itself!

……Keep it Simple in the Kitchen. ~Missy

 

What I DIDN’T do this Summer & The Guilty Pleasure of a Career

What happened?

I am back at work.  I have 2 children who are almost 4 months old.  I am a freaking MOM!  While I have a hard time believing that I am 2 little humans Mommy, all I need to do is look at myself naked to know it happened.  AYE CARAMBA.  I swear…exercise starts today. 

This summer I was going to:

  1. Learn to can
  2. Make baby food
  3. Make jam
  4. Harvest all of my vegetables, clean and freeze them for the winter
  5. Get into the best shape of my life! (I had 3 months of maternity leave to do it, why not!)

This summer I DID do:

  1. Gave birth to twins
  2. Fed twins
  3. Held twins

Humbling is what maternity leave is.  I have never not worked.  I even worked from home while I was on leave, but I will tell you what….being an at home Mommy is really, really hard.  Like, really.  Incredibly hard.  I cannot express this enough.

I am a pretty organized Mommy and my kids do not lack for, well, pretty much anything.  But I was not good at being home.  I spoke to some other Mommies who were SO sad to be going back to work.  They “could stay home forever” or “are so sad to not be with their children every moment.”   When I hear this I think….do they mean it?  Do they feel they have to say that or are they legitiumately that happy caring for their kids 24-7?  I am really curious!  I found it hard.  I struggled.

You would think that after 4 years of fertility issues, then finally having the twins, who are, by the way, the most amazing people ever…that I would want to see every precious breath they take.  This is not the case.  While I sobbed like a coliky baby when they went to daycare for the first time, I was relieved.  I sat down, I thought about my identity and who I am without the twins attached to me.  Who am I?  Why am I relieved to have this time, this space of silence and focus on myself?  Am I a selfish mother?  No, I am not.  I am a woman with a strong sense of identity.  I am a mother.  I am a wife.  I am a successful career woman.  I am so many things.

I have decided that one of the gifts I will give my children is a mother who lives her whole life as a whole person.  A woman without a long list of regrets.  I will let my children know they made my life better.  They did not complete it, because life is still here for living.  They are an extension of me that makes the experience better and teaches me what the deepest love is.  The love a mother has for her children.  Just as strong, but different from the love a woman has for her spouse.

I will love my children as I train for my first marathon.  I will love them as I chase my career dreams.  I will love them as I enjoy wine and beautifully crafted foods.  I will also love them as I hold their hands and walk into the Magical Kingdom of Disneyland.  I will love them as I hold them in their first swim classes and take them to first grade.

There is room enough in my heart for all of us.  I do not have to lose myself, and I hope from this, my children will go off to college and not lose themselves in another person, or a career.  That they will divide themselves equally and enjoy it all. 

I hope they will have a sense of identity……….just like Mom.